[ He shakes his head, eyes closed still even when she touches him. There is nothing to forgive because he does not deserve forgiveness. While Cullen takes her hand and holds it tightly, there is pain in his voice and the gaze that finally meets her. ]

I've abandoned my vows, my dedication to years of service and this is my punishment. I deserve no pity, nor do I deserve your kind words. The things I've done, I--

[ When he tries to move from the wall, he nearly stumbles over. The dizziness overcomes him, and an arm reaches for balance against the stone window as his hand holds firmly to hers. ]

I want nothing to do with The Order anymore... To keep myself bound by their chains means I support every corrupted move they have made. But it is in my selfish decision to break away that I discover I've made a mistake.

[ Glassy, bloodshot eyes manage to at least stay with Neria's. But his focus is off, shaken. Staring at her too long causes her appearance to distort, where he fears he might find something horrifying if he doesn't look away. ]

How can I truly give myself to the Inquisition if I cannot remain loyal to the Chantry? What sort of man does it make me that I run away at the sight of disagreement and fear?

[ He looks to the vial in the distance, swallowing thickly. ]

I should be taking it.

[ Once more, he tries to move. Cullen doesn't let go of Neria even when he tries so hard to make his way to that vial. He shouldn't, he really shouldn't... But should he? ]