[ Just as she always has managed, the hurt that began burning within him is smoothed over by the genuine touch only Neria has. He's not used to this... To having feel so much for one person, and to know that it is nearly the same for the other. There is no doubt that his fellow advisors care for him, that Cassandra cares. Cullen has had the privilege of fighting beside so many incredible people, who trust him and support his decisions. But none have given as much as Neria has, both in what little had happened between them those ten years ago, and what she has given him in the weeks that followed her joining the cause. In their partnership, they have a trust and bond that no one else can touch. ]
[ To know that she cares for him as much as he cares for her? It is quite possibly the best gift he has ever been given. Neria reassures him, tells him that this is not out of pity or obligation, but out of a strong attachment they share. His heart swells, his cheeks warm and the smile he gives is finally genuine when he looks her in the eye. ]
I suppose it would be cruel to argue any further.
[ He laughs. ]
Forgive me. My intention was not to accuse you of offering out of obligation or pity. I'm sure that is how it came across.
I just...
[ Cullen swallows thickly, his thumbs roll lazy circles along her knuckles, where letting go of her hands might mean the end of him at this point. Even with how he nervously seems to tremble. He isn't good at these kinds of talks, of finding himself this close to someone. ]
I care for you just as much. I berate myself for having allowed myself to become so attached to you, but I saw the futility in avoiding such a thing as soon as you entered Skyhold. What I felt ten years ago never left me, no matter how much I protested.
The idea of you leaving? After all this and all we've been through? Reconciled?
I shiver at the thought. It pains me to think of a life without you. If you are to stay without regret, and not out of obligation?
I swear on my life that I will make it worth your while.
no subject
[ To know that she cares for him as much as he cares for her? It is quite possibly the best gift he has ever been given. Neria reassures him, tells him that this is not out of pity or obligation, but out of a strong attachment they share. His heart swells, his cheeks warm and the smile he gives is finally genuine when he looks her in the eye. ]
I suppose it would be cruel to argue any further.
[ He laughs. ]
Forgive me. My intention was not to accuse you of offering out of obligation or pity. I'm sure that is how it came across.
I just...
[ Cullen swallows thickly, his thumbs roll lazy circles along her knuckles, where letting go of her hands might mean the end of him at this point. Even with how he nervously seems to tremble. He isn't good at these kinds of talks, of finding himself this close to someone. ]
I care for you just as much. I berate myself for having allowed myself to become so attached to you, but I saw the futility in avoiding such a thing as soon as you entered Skyhold. What I felt ten years ago never left me, no matter how much I protested.
The idea of you leaving? After all this and all we've been through? Reconciled?
I shiver at the thought. It pains me to think of a life without you. If you are to stay without regret, and not out of obligation?
I swear on my life that I will make it worth your while.