what if there is light beyond the dark; (psl)

[unabatedly]

[ It had been weeks since she first summoned Siegfried in a ritual, a desperate plea for help in the dark. Dwarfing her in height and in raw power, Siegfried was exactly what Neria needed - a dragon slayer, a being who was seemingly invincible and showed no flagging in his stamina. He became her partner and guide, someone who was as dedicated as she to saving the world.

Over those weeks, she has learned more and more about Siegfried's place in his old world. A granter of wishes, someone who tried to please everyone. He is a quiet soul, stalwart, and softly chides her when she is pushing herself too hard - even when he does the same. Siegfried is her only companion in the wilds, traveling the world, as Neria has long given up trying to stay with a group, and she comes to find she prefers his quiet company. He is thoughtful and clever, driven as she is. Their needs align often enough that very few arguments or debates arise, and she is all the more pleased for it.

At night, he is the warmth beside her; in battle, he is the strength at her back, her right arm.

She begins to forget what life was like before him, too used to his company.

Now and then, they slip into broken fissures in the Deep Roads to clear out Darkspawn. They collapse tunnels and set fire to the nests they find. Tiring and dangerous work in between all of the other trouble Neria has on her shoulders. Time and time again, she feels guilty for calling Siegfried, who only wishes to help...and who is stuck doing this work with her, again and again, with no thought or care to himself. He puts himself in harm's way for her, shields her when they come under attack.

You're going to die if you keep trying to save me like this, she tells him more than once. He only smiles.

Exhausted, they climb out of the Deep Roads and make camp one night down by the river. Hair pulled from its braid, sticky with blood, Neria mops up his wounds and her own. ]

There is a town only a day's walk from here. Tomorrow we can look into real shelter for an evening.

[ He does not need a bed, she knows, being the Servant he is. It seems wholly cruel, though, to treat him like a creature or some kind of ethereal being. He is a person with needs and wants; he is her partner. To that end, she considers him to be like any other person, and tends to him as she would for anyone she cares for.

Healing magic washes over his body as she works to scrub the gore from his arms. ]

Does it hurt?

Comments

[gerechtigkeit]

[If he were to be honest, life with his Master (Neria, she reminds him, as she feels she does not deserve that title, nor does he need to place her any higher than him) is something he enjoys. Being a Servant, it's often enough that he's considered nothing more than just a weapon for others to use and better themselves with, like a prized possession rather than supporting the life and breath of another person. And as a Saber class hero, he is sought after even more- his rankings are higher, and he is the strongest class of the standard ones, barring Berserker. He is a tool, and has come to accept that role, even if it is not one he truly wishes to be. So long as he is allowed to carry out his wish- to be allowed to act in the name of justice, he will assist and do as his Master says, at whatever the cost.

Perhaps that's why he and Neria get along so well. Both willing to sacrifice, both with heavy burdens, taking as much as they can to help as many as they can... it is enough weight that it could outright kill them. With one, it already has. Siegfried finds that he enjoys his Master's company, and the time they spend together allows for the both of them to aid others and do as they desire.

On this night, she tells him of where they're headed, and there's a smile on his face as he listens. He needs no rest, he needs no care or consideration that she always gives, and by now he's learned to stop trying to stop her from treating him. He can heal on his own, and yet she insists on taking care of him, as if he were an actual person.

At her question, he shakes his head.]

No, I'm fine- the darkspawn didn't manage to break through my armor much at all this time. [It never hurts, not really. And even if it did, he would never tell her. His reply is spoken with thanks from a man who is so used to being considered less than human, that to anyone else, it would almost sound absurd. But Neria understands Siegfried as a person, and he is all the more grateful for it.]

[unabatedly]

"This time", you say.

[ as it has happened before. Neria's sigh is quiet but bordering on theatrical, and she wipes the last bit of blood from him. her own hands are tacky with red, as a healer's should be, and she scrubs some with the stained cloth, even uselessly. she wrings out the water and tries again, dipping it in the bowl she has, but the both of them are messy enough that it might simply be easier to take a dive in the river.

well. she does. Siegfried can simply clean himself if he wishes. a perk of being a Heroic Spirit, whose form is impermanent. ]

I wish I could get you stronger armor. Herren and Wade could enchant you something but--

[ but the armor Siegfried wears is his own. it cannot be changed. ]

Or perhaps we can find some kind of spell rune you can carry with you to bolster your armor. I don't want you to keep getting hurt. [ for me, being the unspoken end to that sentence. ]

[gerechtigkeit]

[Siegfried goes to argue against her point, but finds he honestly cannot. It’s true- the darkspawn have surprised him in breaking through his defenses, but his magic vulnerability has always been far weaker to his physical. The blight may not be magical, but something about it can still strike at him where he least expects it.

And he can't afford that when it comes to his back.

Her desire to keep him safe doesn't go unnoticed, and Siegfried's brow furrows in thought. As a Heroic Spirit, any alteration of his form won't remain even if he wills it to. The last thing he wants is for his Master to worry about him while she's trying to defend herself. Even as he tries to keep her safe from harm- he knows he cannot, for she will not let him fight alone.

He sighs, a thought coming to his mind vaguely, unsure of how to explain himself.]

...before coming here, there was something called "Ascension." [He remembers his time in Chaldea briefly, as they'd only just begun to correct the history of the world.] I don't know the complexity of it, unfortunately. But it allowed us to gain strength and be able to withstand more as time went on, and more ascensions were done. [He pauses, thinking.] I'm not sure what we could find here that would be similar, but it is possible.

[unabatedly]

[ Neria unwinds her braid while she listens, her gaze intent upon Siegfried's face as he speaks. she hasn't heard of a concept like that before, but that does not discredit what he tells her. gaining strength, hardening his defenses. leveling up like a RPG character. it will be necessary, she thinks. ]

Do you know what materials were used? I could find substitutions, dabble a little... I haven't made a proper potion or done a spell ritual outside of combat in quite some time. [ the idea is somewhat thrilling. but in the end, this is his choice. ]

I can look into other rituals, too. [ something akin to the Joining but without the darkspawn blood. ] What do you think will be best? Did... Have you ever gone through an Ascension? Did it harm you in any way or change you?

[gerechtigkeit]

[To her first questions, he nods.] They varied, and I don't think some even exist here. But dragon fangs as well as scales, phoenix feathers, void dust- things that aren't common in the slightest. [He tilts his head, mulling over a thought for a moment.] I don't know what else can be found here- we collected those in our journeys across singularities.

[He closes his eyes, truly thinking over the possibilities.]

I haven't been through it, no- but I've seen others who have. The only thing that changed with them was how they looked. Their personality remained the same, and I don't believe they were harmed at all. If anything, they seemed grateful.

[He opens his eyes once more.]

Master, if this will protect you and us from danger in the future, then I will do whatever I must in order to keep you safe.

[unabatedly]

Dragon fangs and scales are things I can get. I have resources. [ unfortunately. but some of those she cannot give him for fear of what it may do. Siegfried does not need to be associated with her Archdemon. ]

In the mountains, we can obtain drake scales, too, if those make a difference. [ dragon blood, too, will be helpful...but she wonders how it will affect things. she can look into lyrium dust, cobble together things that could used. and they will need a great deal of mana for him. Neria is a wellspring of it but he may need more. if she can bolster her power and then give him all of it... if feeding his body more than what their shared bond will allow will provide him what he needs--

she meets his gaze. ]

I only want to do right by you, Siegfried. I'm able to keep myself...relatively safe, considering my line of work. And you've protected me. You have. I just...worry about this world's effects on you. I don't want the Blight to touch you.

[gerechtigkeit]

Any of those would help, I'd imagine. [There's a huff of amusement from him, at that.] It's unsurprising that a dragonslayer like myself needs those for ascension.

[His face eases into a smile, at that.]

You've done so much for me already, do not ever believe you haven't. Both you and I take what precautions we can against the Blight, and I've yet to feel anything change. If anything ever happens, or I notice anything amiss, we'll face it together.

[unabatedly]

Then I'll start gather materials right away.

[ and at the rest... well. Neria smiles, reaching out. her hand brushes his cheek gently, no matter the mess, the grime, or the blood. her smile is fond. ]

You are my friend and my partner, Siegfried. I would see you safe. The Blight so far has not harmed you...but that may change. [ A beat. ] Regardless, I am with you. I'll be by your side, no matter what happens.

ascension 1

[unabatedly]

[ dragon scales. drake blood. lyrium dust. it's a roughshod ritual she's attempting, no true spell or incantation, nothing even remotely concrete. it's frustrating and a little shameful, if she were to admit it, being someone who likes to be prepared... but it will have to do. she spends days trying to find the right measure of things, doing calculations and judging what she will need to do. even so, she is left with little recourse and not much to go on.

so, she will do what she does best: push through and hope she is enough.

she takes Siegfried to one of the few places she knows where the influence of the Fade is heavy but the Veil still holds firm: Haven, just beneath the Temple of Sacred Ashes. in the night, she takes him as close to the mountaintop as she dares, knowing the dragon might still lurk somewhere. the blood she pours in a circle, which she bids Siegfried enter.

the rest is going to be significantly more dangerous, she realizes. this fact she keeps from her Servant, knowing he might protest.

Neria knocks back an entire lyrium potion, waiting until it sings in her veins, all of her mana poised, bloated, ready for her bidding. she feels the connection she has with Siegfried, magic circuits open, ready to accept her mana, her life if needed. the binding is practically touchable here, a golden thread she can follow back to Siegfried's very heart and soul if she wanted to. in the dark, her eyes seem bright, a gold that seems to shimmer in the moonlight.

now is the time.

she slices open her arm until the blood runs freely down to her fingers. the lyrium dust, gathered, is scattered to the wind - and with the magic in her blood, she reaches out for the inherent magical properties in the substance, latching to it, draining it. grasping the dragon scales, she sets them ablaze in her hands, feeling the thrum of old energy trapped within of something ancient and powerful. ]

Hear my words.

[ like the summoning from before. ]

My will creates your body and your sword creates my destiny. In flesh and bone I will forge you anew. Blood of my blood, our souls entwined. Take nourishment from my mana; in flame and power I grant you this ascension.

[ the lyrium dust sparks with power, glittering, humming with Neria's energy. the fire licking her blood-soaked fingers, she reaches up and takes all of the magic she has at her disposal, the simmering strength in the scales, the blood, the dust - and she channels it directly from herself to Siegfried, allowing it to coat his circuits, his body, all of him. she gives him all of herself, every scrap she can manage. all of herself, all that she is, is his to take.

Neria's eyes meet Siegfried's. ]

Arise, Siegfried.