[ He questions not where this is going, what all of this means. Cullen finds comfort in not only her words, but her gestures, and he hangs on to every single one. To know that he has caused her happiness means the world to him and sets his heart at ease. Knowing that she doesn't want to leave does just as much, if not more. Even if the Inquisition were to relieve her, he would certainly do all he could to keep her there. ]
You honor me with such words.
[ Cullen reaches for the hand that cups his face, holding it a brief moment before his hand caresses her forearm. ]
I would not have it any other way, my lady. Anything you want from me, anything I can give... It is yours.
[ They were planning an attack at the Winter Palace not too long ago. But Cullen couldn't say when things too such a strange turn. Though he worries not, especially not when he finds himself lost in her gaze, content in her touch where he seeks out more. Once he would have considered this inappropriate, and part of him still does... But she is no longer his charge, now his equal and his partner. There is no guilt in how he looks at her and how she touches him, and it brings a smile to his face. ]
You've already given me so much. There's nothing else I can ask for.
[ He has given her loyalty, solace, comfort, patience... Things she has not felt worthy of in such a long time. Even now, she doesn't feel worthy of what he's given her. If anyone feels honored, it is her, and she has no way to properly express that to him that won't incite another roundabout discussion. Her hand falls from his cheek to his jaw, cradling it there, her eyes never leaving his face. If anything is to happen between them, if anything should happen to them, if she should lose him... She wants to memorize this moment, to remember the way he looks at her now. If she has to leave, she will remember this and keep it with her for the rest of her days.
Cullen has accepted her, sins and all, and it hurts her chest just as it makes her heart swell to bursting.
And she says nothing for some time, uncertain, until her hand squeezes his and she clears her throat. Her gaze drops from his but the smile remains, crooked and awkward. ]
We should...focus on what we were doing. We'll have to leave and prepare.
[ It's so difficult to say those words but they have a duty to fulfill. She's promised herself that she won't let this chance fall by the wayside, and she won't. But for now...the Inquisition needs the both of them focused on the task at hand, lest something happen in their ignorance. ]
But we can return to this another time. I promise.
[ Silence falls over them so quickly, lasting the better half of an eternity. Cullen cannot find enough comfort in that, and he is content to simply get lost in her gaze until he draws his final breath. What has been forged between them and what is to come is unknown, unsaid. But it is in Neria's gaze and the way she touches his face so fondly that he can only assume that this doesn't end here. No matter what goes on outside of this room and what is to occur in their near future, there is confidence in this. In what is before them, even as unnamed as it may be. ]
[ Cullen finds himself holding on to her arm, a gentle grasp where his thumb caresses soft skin. Such a contrast to the hardened figure that she maintains, that has seen so much battle and bloodshed. He could only see her as an angel, truly, even with the darkness that follows her and often shrouds her in guilt and despair. What he would do to wash all of that away for her, to give her another chance she so rightfully deserves. Even if she doesn't think so. ]
[ His eyes fall upon her lips, where they remain for some time. What should he do? Should he act upon feelings that have bottled up for so long? Or should he maintain the propriety that he should expect to be held as they are partners in command? It's clear that it is only he who feels this way, judging by the constant prying his fellow advisors and leader have maintained since her arrival. But before he can even act or say another word, Neria lets go and turns back to their work. ]
[ Right. There are more important matters to attend to first. Cullen breaks away, hand immediately retreating to the back of his neck to nurse a nervous tick. ]
Yes. You're right.
[ Letting go of her hand is nearly painful, as if he is tearing his own limb. But they can continue this discussion at a later, unknown date. ]
Alright.
[ The rest of the evening is left for planning and arranging the proper forms of contact needed. They send for messenger birds, ones who will arrive with the plans necessary before their return to Skyhold. The journey itself takes some time, crossing from Crestwood back to the Frostbacks where they will immediately take leave for Halamshiral. It is a slow process, an agonizing journey where tensions are high among all of them. There is no telling as to whether or not Corypheus will truly be there, or what his followers have in store. ]
[ The matter at hand is particularly in regards to Duke Gaspard and Briala, where the tensions of civil war have made taking sides both all too simple and dangerous amongst the other advisors. There are talks, debates on the way to the palace, but they are silenced quickly once they are to pass through the gates. From then on, it is all about playing the Game and playing it right, to which Cullen absolutely dreads. ]
[ He is provided a post, just as the rest of them. With Cullen and Neria having arranged their proper groups just outside of the palace walls. His post is within the ballroom, where he attempts to remain both quiet and appear to be interested in the party. Upon delegation and discussion with the Inquisitor, he awaits both information and command she sees fit to provide. ]
[ Time will move slowly, just as it tends to do in times of stress and eagerness. What feels like hours are merely a few minutes, though it is shocking to see how quickly a crowd of people have decided to circle around him. He feels alone in a sea of strangers, blood boiling as they fawn over him like a caged creature. ]
Good evening. [ He forces a smile and bow to a gentleman approaching him, one out of many. While Cullen can't see behind the shining mask that covers him, he certainly can feel the shit-eating grin that radiates behind it. ]
It certainly is, Commander. [ The gentleman gives a bow, almost too eagerly. ] Now that I have gotten myself both acquainted with the Inquisition and the fine festivities-- You stand out so gallantly in such a marvelous shade of crimson. Far finer than even the décor surrounding us.
[ Cullen shifts his glance away, clearing his throat. ]
I, er--
Thank... You?
[ The gentleman laughs. ] Modest? Surely, you hear compliments such as that often.
[ Cullen can't press against the wall hard enough, especially when a couple gaggling women adjacent to him have to agree. And passionately. ]
I have heard... Enough remarks similar. Mostly just tonight.
[ Planning for the affair seems easier, in hindsight, to actually attending the soiree. Duke Gaspard has taken it upon himself to invite them, either to cheat Celene out of the chance or because he needs the protection and backing the Inquisition offers. In either case, they make their way into the ballroom and to their respective posts upon being announced to the room, and Neria has to do her best to keep still. She wants to be moving around, investigating, asking questions...but she has acquiesced to the Inquisitor's request that she take a position to help keep eyes out for the usurper in their midst.
The nobility that approach her seem torn between fascination and fear, all questioning whether she is a ghost or if select rumors have some merit (that the Breach brought her back from the grave, that the Herald might be dabbling in blood magic) that she spends the better part of an hour denying every which way.
Interest in her, at least, seems to wax and wane then; there are still individuals interested in speaking to her (and making foolish passes, of course), but the majority of people more interested in gathering dirt on the Inquisitor or making Neria out to be some kind of monster seem to pass on to pester the other advisors and the Inquisitor's companions. It's then that she is better able to scan the room for their potential target, anyone suspicious--
And her eyes land on Cullen in the corner, practically surrounded by various people. She can't help but smile; he's as uncomfortable as a mage in a Templar mess hall, fidgeting under the scrutinizing gaze of so many people.
Carefully, she slips away from her post just to go lend him a hand. ]
Commander.
[ Her voice alone is enough to get a few heads to turn. She doesn't smile, regarding the scene as if she would judge recruits. ]
Commander, the Inquisitor requests your presence in the foyer.
[ He tries to remind himself often that this should be the least of his worries right now, and that the persistent company he is keeping is far less threatening than what awaits them. Though, the usurper could easily be amongst those who are crowding him, and Cullen is forced to make face through the entirety of it. There is a lingering headache that begins to grow, and his face hurts from the smile he has faked since the beginning. ]
[ The familiar voice that calls him from beyond the crowd is welcomed and comforting, immediately. Even if there is likely bad news to follow, being pulled away from this crowd is certainly preferable to what is likely in store for him. Cullen hears the disappointing moans of a few when they clear way for Neria. ]
[ His gaze meets with hers, testing it, wondering and hoping she is truly just trying to pull him away. Cullen matches her expression. ]
Very well.
[ He bows his head in the direction of his company. ]
If you would excuse me, please.
[ And he walks by, hearing the plea of a woman requesting he not take too long. It's in that passing that he feels what can only likely be a hand brushing along his behind that he pauses, darting his head back to look and realizing he is too late to catch who did it. ]
[ Cullen straightens himself, makes face, and quickly comes to Neria's side. Quietly, he gestures for her to lead. ]
[ Neria only lifts a single eyebrow at the crowd, as if testing what they will say. Her eyes scan their faces, all hidden by masks, and she tries to pick out any obvious characteristics among them. Surely there must be something they are missing, something obvious. A sneer, a chuckle, someone carrying themselves differently... But there's nothing, always nothing.
What are they missing?
She keeps her expression as unchanging as possible, all professional even as Cullen joins her, and especially as she hears the quiet giggles as Cullen turns back. She leads him out of the throng and far enough away from his admirers before she speaks. ]
I'm starting to miss fighting Darkspawn. I'd take mindless monsters over mindless airheads tonight.
[ At least the older men and women in the gathering tonight have provided enough intellectual discussion for her not to feel as if she might scream. Neria enjoys the Game for what it is, for the calculated measures, but the sheer level of foolishness in some of the attendees tonight leave much to be desired. ]
She's not actually looking for you, you know. I thought you could use some air after...all of that.
[ And it gives them the opportunity to get a different perspective on the area they've been watching for some time. ]
[ Cullen has run into a similar issue, unable to read those around him. It is as frustrating as it is discomforting, knowing that any moment they could see a greater threat in the midst. It doesn't help that Cullen isn't much a fan of parties. ]
[ Once they reach a decent distance from the crowd, Cullen is able to breathe. He exhales heavily, reaching up to pinch the bridge of his nose. ]
Maker, the headache this is giving me. I would hate to sound cruel, but I can't help but agree with you. How Josephine deals with such matters often is beyond me. I can't help but admire her tenacity with these sorts of people.
[ His hand drops, and he meets Neria's gaze, a relieved smile. ]
Because most people aren't this foolish in their hedonism. The narcissism in this room could be cut with a knife. At least Josephine has worked with more intelligent and stimulating characters over the past few months.
[ The masks make her uncomfortable, too, truth be told. They are a few faces in a sea of unknowns and it makes her almost sick to her stomach. She can't turn in any direction without being faced by someone with gold or silver adornments or false smiles in place. It's terribly distracting.
She gives Cullen a brief smile as well as they walk towards the large doors leading to the foyer. ]
Don't thank me yet. I've bought you a few minutes at best. We can't spend too long away from our posts, even though Leliana and Josephine have their eyes on the floor too. Still, it seemed a fine excuse for the moment.
[ There is a nauseating feeling this place gives him, the masks merely encouraging it deep in the pit of his stomach. Everything done and said sounds so fake, so rehearsed. While Cullen is used to holding immediate suspicion to strangers surrounding him, there is a far more difficult challenge in reading the people here. He's spent this whole time eagerly and anxiously awaiting what the Inquisitor's investigations find, stuck in a corner to await orders. It feels terribly agonizing, even if it is productive all the same. ]
[ Once they arrive to the foyer, Cullen finds refuge at a railing, where his hands rest along the surface and prop him up for a lean. ]
With how painfully slow this evening has started to play out, mere minutes may last an eternity. I'll find relief in even thirty seconds away from those people. Here's to hoping they give up and move away from my post.
[ But he's sure they won't. And Cullen wears a crooked smile to such a thought. He turns a touch, facing her while one elbow leans on the railing for support. ]
How are you fairing? Word has already flown clear across the ballroom about you quite possibly being a demon having escaped the afterlife. No doubt they've had quite the time pointing out the irony in my partnering with you.
[ While he takes a moment to recuperate, she stands tall, her eyes on the people milling about around them. Still, there's no sign of anyone of import, though she can see a few dwarves hanging about in the upstairs. A few former generals have congregated nearby and are muttering war stories to one another, while others gossip in a corner nearby. No one has any real tells and there are far too many people for the four of them to keep track of. At least the Empress is surrounded by her guards for the moment.
Unless the guards have a traitor in their midst. Maker, this is getting to be too much.
She makes a quiet little noise, not quite a chuckle, and she shakes her head. ]
Oh, there's a myriad of things being said. I've been possessed by a demon from the Breach, that you're keeping me on a tight leash lest I lose my mind. That the Inquisitor practices blood magic. That I brought Corypheus' archdemon with me as I was spit back up from the Void. Take your pick, they're all equally ridiculous.
[ Spurred on by boredom and bred by fear of the Inquisition's power, as well as Kaia's mysterious hand. ]
At the very least, they seem frightened enough of me to resist trying to fondle any of my assets.
[ Tied in with the stress of the situation, the absolutely awful rumors are enough to make his head spin. Though, this was to be expected. It is understandable that doubtfuls would find her ten-year absence a cause for concern when she so suddenly appears out of nowhere. But Neria would not be the first to put herself in exile. ]
[ Cullen can't help but chuckle at the mention of a "tight leash". Such a thought is as despicable as it is ridiculous. And it only ties back in to the supposed irony he has been accused of living in. ]
You would think the dire situation we are in would hold higher precedence than mere rumor and the spitting of poison.
[ He raises a brow at that clear mention she made of being fondled. ]
You saw that? I couldn't have possibly turned around any faster and I still could not find the culprit. Perhaps I am not maintaining a threatening enough posture. Surely, you must show me how to be more intimidating.
Well, remember that we're present and our enemies are not. If we could convince Corypheus to come here himself, he'd probably have just as much of a headache with the amount of rumors and hearsay they'd inquire about. It's really not a wonder why he's determined to destroy the world.
[ That last bit, of course, is dripping in sarcasm. She gives Cullen a brief sideways glance. ]
And if you think people wouldn't use the moment to ask him to confirm or deny their little fabricated tales, you would be very wrong.
[ For all that everyone seems to be afraid of Neria being a demon, a corpse, or worse, no one has actively tried to avoid her. She doubts a walking, talking Darkspawn would be treated as anything but a novelty once the terror had worn off. She shakes her head, putting both hands out to lean on the railing for a moment. ]
Truthfully? I think they believe I'm more intimidating than I am. But if I want to impress, I just remind myself this: anything a person can do pales in comparison to facing down an Archdemon in a city on fire.
[ Her smile is just this side of self-deprecating. ]
After that, it's not so frightening to look down at leaders and world-shakers.
If only it were that easy. I'd almost prefer Corypheus make his presence here so we can get it over with, rather than deal with all of this ridiculous game nonsense and blatant narcissism.
But the rational part of me pleads I be careful what I wish for.
[ His nose wrinkles at the mention of being more intimidating. Neria is hardly the sort, but she's apparently done better among the guests than he has. ]
At this point, I would be better off adorning deeper scars across my face. I just hope this night plays out quicker. The air here is thick and I don't quite enjoy being so possibly close to a potential assassin without knowing.
Only if he shows up in silks and furs and is made to dance like everyone else here. And then he can fall on the Inquisitor's blade at the end of the night.
[ Too bad that's a fantasy that will never come to light. Neria turns and leans her hip against the railing, keeping an eye on the door for a few moments. Her gaze quickly flickers back to him as she shakes her head, and she reaches out to touch his arm for a moment. ]
Your face is fine as it is. And you are allowed to tell them to bugger off, you know. Just...politely.
[ Realizing that perhaps touching him is showing too much, she releases him, allowing the gesture to look more friendly than anything else. ]
[ But yes, it is a distant fantasy that will likely never happen, and Cullen moves on from the idea. His attention shifts back and forth from the door to Neria, keeping an eye out in case it is necessary. So far, nothing too exciting, and his attention is brought back to Neria when he feels her arm reach for him. It's more comforting than she might think, and Cullen manages a smile for her. ]
I am here to maintain appearances. If this is what I must endure for the sake of a victory, I'll do so. The last thing I want is to cause reason to feel insulted, and we both know how touchy some of these people are.
[ He clears his throat when she lets go, straightening his posture as he lowers his voice. ]
I can't be so sure. I have heard enough talks among the crowd, and Leliana's sources tell me of Briala having been a past lover of the Empress. There is enough motive after being made practically a prisoner to the court to at least arrange an assassination. But I've yet to hear much beyond that to support taking a side.
I can understand why the Duke sees it fit to take place on the throne. Military backing is important when running an empire, and it appears Celine is not as serious on the matter as he. She would be right to spend more time organizing protection rather than keeping appearances.
Why the Duke might be a suspect is still beyond me. It is yet to be shown, and we'll do right to await the Inquisitor's findings.
[ He looks back at her, his normally serious expression firmly in place. ]
[ Fair enough. He has more patience than she...but he has always been in a role where it has been necessary for him to maintain a certain decorum. She has gone too long without needing to adhere to many rules, half of her life spent in the Circle and the other half as a Warden. She gives him a smile as he turns to look at her, and her brighter expression sobers up quickly.
They are here to work. She remembers that, even if she'd rather see him continue to smile.
Neria hums thoughtfully, glancing over his shoulder to keep an eye on the rest of the room at his back as he speaks. When she replies, it is quiet, her tone low. ]
The Duke could equally be as desperate. I'll agree that it seems unlikely he would align himself with Corypheus; he seems the type to prefer something less subtle, something that would reclaim his honor as he ascends the throne. Aligning with a magister won't do that.
Briala... Calculated, possibly dangerous, but I don't think she would help Corypheus of her own accord. I don't believe she'd try to kill Celene, either. Not outright, not here. She has plenty of other opportunities, and to have the Empress killed at her own party will have her be martyred for it.
[ Neria pauses, thinking that over. ]
Or, perhaps that's all the more reason to do it tonight... Still, I don't think she's the type.
[ Briefly, her eyes follow a couple as they steal away into the trophy hallway and are, of course, berated by the older generals still conversing about their war days. She frowns. ]
...What if Celene is the one working with Corypheus to ensure her place on the throne? And tonight, he's sending someone to kill her so he can take it for himself?
[ Neria poses a good point, and Cullen doesn't outright disagree. Not now, and certainly not when neither of them have decent evidence to properly investigate. He crosses his arms, one hand grasping his chin gently has he has yet another look around. He can hear whispers in the distance, a pair of gentleman speaking of how Gaspard is a fool. There is another group of people not too far spending more time complaining about the food than matters at hand. All ridiculous yammer, which makes it all the more necessary to focus back on Neria. ]
There... Is a chance at that, I am sure. We've both seen how likely corruption is, and I wouldn't be surprised to see if the Empress fell to similar temptations.
[ Cullen lowers his arms and shakes his head. ]
But I don't believe she would go such lengths. All things considered, Celene is a well put-together woman, far more concerned about peace to fall victim to chaos. Either way, Corypheus wouldn't need the threat of her as an inside agent as an excuse.
I hope Kaia is able to gather information fast. Time is of the essence, and the longer we are here, the greater risk we pose for ourselves.
Whoever it is, they won't be someone who's new to the court. They would have had to receive an invitation to come, someone she trusts or has some tie to. The arrow or the knife might not be in their hands, but it will be someone she knows. Of that, I'm certain.
[ She bristles and nods, finally looking back at him. She has faith in the Inquisitor and her companions, and knows she will find something. They're running out of time...but for the moment, Celene appears safe. Surrounded by guards, by her cousin and Briala, Neria believes she is out of danger for the time being.
With a gesture, she steps away, nodding to the doors. ]
Come, we should return before too much time has passed. Leliana and Josephine are probably wondering where we've slipped off to.
[ And it isn't until she's close to the doors that she realizes how that must sound. She rolls her eyes and turns back to Cullen as she opens the door for him. ]
I mean-- You know what I mean. They're probably worried for...
[ It's then that she pauses, seeing something over his shoulder. All color seems to drain from her face. ]
Morrigan?
[ Even from a distance, she recognizes her...and recognizes Kaia herself descending the stairs with her, the both of them locked in a conversation. Neria takes Cullen's arm and pulls him with her through the doors so she can have a better look at the both of them speaking, her eyes wide. What is she doing here, and why is she speaking to the Inquisitor?
[ Cullen nods to her point, though he doesn't have much time to add his own two-cents to it. It doesn't matter, because he agrees. It matters not who is the culprit or where they came from, just that Empress Celene trusts that person enough to have sent them an invitation. Such a heart-breaking fact, but it is true. ]
Oh, come on, surely they don't think we're--
[ He stops, watching as the color leaves Neria's face and she grasps onto his arm and pulls. His gaze looks upon where hers is, seeing the Inquisitor and Morrigan in the distance. He knows... Of her at the very least, but why spark such a reaction from Neria? ]
[ Years ago, Morrigan had told Neria that they would not meet again. She had watched her friend disappear through an Eluvian to untold lands, with a child she had never seen. To see her again brings back all of those memories again in full force...as well as all of the guilt once more. She's kept silent because of Morrigan, for her safety. To see her here in a ball gown, walking amidst the other nobles as if she's one of them--
She doesn't know what to say. How is she here? How did no one know that she was here?
For several moments, she is silent, simply looking back at Morrigan and Kaia. Then, she turns to him and shakes her head. ]
No. It's... I need to speak with Leliana...but that will have to wait. We should get back to our posts.
[ Surely Leliana must know. But if she did, why did no one tell her? ]
[ He senses it... Whether or not he knows what the issue is, he senses fear and dread in Neria. Even as they pass through the doors to the ballroom, Cullen holds no concern for those around him for the time being. Even with how serious the matters at hand are now, it is just as important that his partner's well being is intact. Cullen stops in front of her, hands reaching out to grab each arm gently. ]
Our posts can wait another moment.
Are you alright?
[ There's that serious gaze of his again, if not without a large touch of worry. ]
[ She can't do this right now. There are too many questions on her own for her to ask before she can even begin to touch on what is really wrong, and even then... She needs to keep Morrigan safe. The moment someone knows the origins of her son and what is possibly within him, she will be in danger, and even this many years later, she refuses to give up the truth on that.
Neria looks up at Cullen as he takes her arms, and she lifts a hand to touch his briefly, just for a moment. ]
I'm fine. I will be fine. I simply...
[ No, not here. Not where people can hear them. ]
I promise, we'll speak about this later. I promise. But I swear, I am fine. I was simply surprised to see her.
[ That look on her face was daunting, troubling. But there is at least reassurance that she is well, and she certainly is right. This... Is not the place. Nor the time. With hesitation and even some regret, Cullen releases her. ]
Alright...
[ He takes a look towards his post, seeing that his fantastic crowd of "fine company" is still there. With a sigh, he takes one last look at her. ]
Another time then.
[ There is enough hesitation here that he doesn't even feel comfortable leaving her. But he must... With one last reach to her, a simple brush to her arm, he takes off. ]
[ Now isn't the time. In truth, there is no good time for what she would have to tell him, and she still will not. Not now. Not until she's spoken to Morrigan. Her heart hangs heavy and she hates that she has to continue to keep her silence, especially with him, but he lets her go just the same. She gives him a brave look. ]
I know. If I need you--
[ I will find you. And that is all she can promise as she returns to her place and awaits the Inquisitor's return to the ballroom.
It doesn't come soon enough, and Kaia is back again into the fray on her search. Morrigan has given the Inquisitor a key and soon disappears to be with Celene, allowing Neria to breathe again. If Morrigan is around, then surely the Empress will be safe. Leliana, of course, doesn't seem to think so...but it isn't long before Kaia is back again, bringing with her a quick debate over who might be guilty, who might be involved, and the stakes of letting Celene die.
So long as someone sits the throne... She had to make this decision once before in the middle of a war, but not in such a dire moment. The Landsmeet seems tame compared to this.
It's difficult for her to remain there when the Inquisitor leaves again, more so when she suddenly appears again in armor. But she insists that she will handle Florianne and she does so brilliantly. She calls her out at her own game in front of everyone, exposing her for the crimes she's committed, and she is very quickly dealt with. Neria feels a swell of humility at the sight, thankful, again, that it is Lady Trevelyan who is in charge and not her.
Kaia disappears again with Celene, Gaspard, and Briala...and only returns with the former to address the people. Whatever's happened, she hopes is for the best, and it feels as if there is a collective sigh of relief throughout the room. The war is over and Corypheus has not succeeded. It is another victory for the Inquisition.
Neria slips away at last to look for Morrigan and she does end up eventually cornering her. There isn't enough time for a real conversation, not as the ball is winding down, but Morrigan assures her that they will meet and speak again, as her old friend is being sent with the Inquisition, but Neria doesn't have much time to get any comfort or answers from her. Those will have to wait for another day.
She is about to return to the ballroom when she runs into Cullen once more near the fountain, and she gives him a small smile. ]
[ Everything happens so quickly, and Cullen supposes there is plenty of relief in not needing to push their troops upon the palace. There is a victory in not needing to use them, as each life is certainly valuable. But Cullen is sure that he will feel whiplash in the morning, from how the night began so agonizingly slow, only to rush forward in a sense of urgency. ]
[ He truly believed the only resolution was for Celene to die. If Gaspard took the throne, at least he would do well with his soldiers and maintain a certain balance Celene could not. But Kaia seemed rather hell-bent on avoiding such a resolution, which Cullen actually could agree with upon discovering the threats Gaspard had made and the deaths he had arranged. Florianne is just as guilty, if not more, and he eagerly awaits her judgement upon their return. ]
[ There is glory upon the announcement of the civil war coming to an end, that they have the backing of Celene's empire to the Inquisition's cause. Such a victory is worth its weight in gold. But Cullen does not cheer, nor does he partake in the continuing festivities. He is tired, both physically and mentally. Between travels from Crestwood to Skyhold, straight to Halamshiral, he can count on one hand how many hours of sleep he has gotten. While there is worry in the well-being of Neria, he trusts that she would come to him if absolutely necessary. Still, there is comfort and relief when she finds him near the fountain. He's resting on a bench when she finds him, face in his hands a moment before he sits up. ]
[ Cullen greets Neria with a smile when he stands, gentle in its delivery. ]
"Trying" does not do it justice. But... Yes, it certainly has been.
[ He at least had been nursing a glass of wine, which he sets down. ]
The Inquisition has maintained yet another victory. Were I not so worn down, I might be inclined to celebrate.
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You honor me with such words.
[ Cullen reaches for the hand that cups his face, holding it a brief moment before his hand caresses her forearm. ]
I would not have it any other way, my lady. Anything you want from me, anything I can give... It is yours.
[ They were planning an attack at the Winter Palace not too long ago. But Cullen couldn't say when things too such a strange turn. Though he worries not, especially not when he finds himself lost in her gaze, content in her touch where he seeks out more. Once he would have considered this inappropriate, and part of him still does... But she is no longer his charge, now his equal and his partner. There is no guilt in how he looks at her and how she touches him, and it brings a smile to his face. ]
no subject
[ He has given her loyalty, solace, comfort, patience... Things she has not felt worthy of in such a long time. Even now, she doesn't feel worthy of what he's given her. If anyone feels honored, it is her, and she has no way to properly express that to him that won't incite another roundabout discussion. Her hand falls from his cheek to his jaw, cradling it there, her eyes never leaving his face. If anything is to happen between them, if anything should happen to them, if she should lose him... She wants to memorize this moment, to remember the way he looks at her now. If she has to leave, she will remember this and keep it with her for the rest of her days.
Cullen has accepted her, sins and all, and it hurts her chest just as it makes her heart swell to bursting.
And she says nothing for some time, uncertain, until her hand squeezes his and she clears her throat. Her gaze drops from his but the smile remains, crooked and awkward. ]
We should...focus on what we were doing. We'll have to leave and prepare.
[ It's so difficult to say those words but they have a duty to fulfill. She's promised herself that she won't let this chance fall by the wayside, and she won't. But for now...the Inquisition needs the both of them focused on the task at hand, lest something happen in their ignorance. ]
But we can return to this another time. I promise.
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[ Cullen finds himself holding on to her arm, a gentle grasp where his thumb caresses soft skin. Such a contrast to the hardened figure that she maintains, that has seen so much battle and bloodshed. He could only see her as an angel, truly, even with the darkness that follows her and often shrouds her in guilt and despair. What he would do to wash all of that away for her, to give her another chance she so rightfully deserves. Even if she doesn't think so. ]
[ His eyes fall upon her lips, where they remain for some time. What should he do? Should he act upon feelings that have bottled up for so long? Or should he maintain the propriety that he should expect to be held as they are partners in command? It's clear that it is only he who feels this way, judging by the constant prying his fellow advisors and leader have maintained since her arrival. But before he can even act or say another word, Neria lets go and turns back to their work. ]
[ Right. There are more important matters to attend to first. Cullen breaks away, hand immediately retreating to the back of his neck to nurse a nervous tick. ]
Yes. You're right.
[ Letting go of her hand is nearly painful, as if he is tearing his own limb. But they can continue this discussion at a later, unknown date. ]
Alright.
[ The rest of the evening is left for planning and arranging the proper forms of contact needed. They send for messenger birds, ones who will arrive with the plans necessary before their return to Skyhold. The journey itself takes some time, crossing from Crestwood back to the Frostbacks where they will immediately take leave for Halamshiral. It is a slow process, an agonizing journey where tensions are high among all of them. There is no telling as to whether or not Corypheus will truly be there, or what his followers have in store. ]
[ The matter at hand is particularly in regards to Duke Gaspard and Briala, where the tensions of civil war have made taking sides both all too simple and dangerous amongst the other advisors. There are talks, debates on the way to the palace, but they are silenced quickly once they are to pass through the gates. From then on, it is all about playing the Game and playing it right, to which Cullen absolutely dreads. ]
[ He is provided a post, just as the rest of them. With Cullen and Neria having arranged their proper groups just outside of the palace walls. His post is within the ballroom, where he attempts to remain both quiet and appear to be interested in the party. Upon delegation and discussion with the Inquisitor, he awaits both information and command she sees fit to provide. ]
[ Time will move slowly, just as it tends to do in times of stress and eagerness. What feels like hours are merely a few minutes, though it is shocking to see how quickly a crowd of people have decided to circle around him. He feels alone in a sea of strangers, blood boiling as they fawn over him like a caged creature. ]
Good evening. [ He forces a smile and bow to a gentleman approaching him, one out of many. While Cullen can't see behind the shining mask that covers him, he certainly can feel the shit-eating grin that radiates behind it. ]
It certainly is, Commander. [ The gentleman gives a bow, almost too eagerly. ] Now that I have gotten myself both acquainted with the Inquisition and the fine festivities-- You stand out so gallantly in such a marvelous shade of crimson. Far finer than even the décor surrounding us.
[ Cullen shifts his glance away, clearing his throat. ]
I, er--
Thank... You?
[ The gentleman laughs. ] Modest? Surely, you hear compliments such as that often.
[ Cullen can't press against the wall hard enough, especially when a couple gaggling women adjacent to him have to agree. And passionately. ]
I have heard... Enough remarks similar. Mostly just tonight.
[ This party needs to end. Now. ]
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The nobility that approach her seem torn between fascination and fear, all questioning whether she is a ghost or if select rumors have some merit (that the Breach brought her back from the grave, that the Herald might be dabbling in blood magic) that she spends the better part of an hour denying every which way.
Interest in her, at least, seems to wax and wane then; there are still individuals interested in speaking to her (and making foolish passes, of course), but the majority of people more interested in gathering dirt on the Inquisitor or making Neria out to be some kind of monster seem to pass on to pester the other advisors and the Inquisitor's companions. It's then that she is better able to scan the room for their potential target, anyone suspicious--
And her eyes land on Cullen in the corner, practically surrounded by various people. She can't help but smile; he's as uncomfortable as a mage in a Templar mess hall, fidgeting under the scrutinizing gaze of so many people.
Carefully, she slips away from her post just to go lend him a hand. ]
Commander.
[ Her voice alone is enough to get a few heads to turn. She doesn't smile, regarding the scene as if she would judge recruits. ]
Commander, the Inquisitor requests your presence in the foyer.
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[ The familiar voice that calls him from beyond the crowd is welcomed and comforting, immediately. Even if there is likely bad news to follow, being pulled away from this crowd is certainly preferable to what is likely in store for him. Cullen hears the disappointing moans of a few when they clear way for Neria. ]
[ His gaze meets with hers, testing it, wondering and hoping she is truly just trying to pull him away. Cullen matches her expression. ]
Very well.
[ He bows his head in the direction of his company. ]
If you would excuse me, please.
[ And he walks by, hearing the plea of a woman requesting he not take too long. It's in that passing that he feels what can only likely be a hand brushing along his behind that he pauses, darting his head back to look and realizing he is too late to catch who did it. ]
[ Cullen straightens himself, makes face, and quickly comes to Neria's side. Quietly, he gestures for her to lead. ]
After you, Warden-Commander.
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What are they missing?
She keeps her expression as unchanging as possible, all professional even as Cullen joins her, and especially as she hears the quiet giggles as Cullen turns back. She leads him out of the throng and far enough away from his admirers before she speaks. ]
I'm starting to miss fighting Darkspawn. I'd take mindless monsters over mindless airheads tonight.
[ At least the older men and women in the gathering tonight have provided enough intellectual discussion for her not to feel as if she might scream. Neria enjoys the Game for what it is, for the calculated measures, but the sheer level of foolishness in some of the attendees tonight leave much to be desired. ]
She's not actually looking for you, you know. I thought you could use some air after...all of that.
[ And it gives them the opportunity to get a different perspective on the area they've been watching for some time. ]
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[ Once they reach a decent distance from the crowd, Cullen is able to breathe. He exhales heavily, reaching up to pinch the bridge of his nose. ]
Maker, the headache this is giving me. I would hate to sound cruel, but I can't help but agree with you. How Josephine deals with such matters often is beyond me. I can't help but admire her tenacity with these sorts of people.
[ His hand drops, and he meets Neria's gaze, a relieved smile. ]
Thank you. You've earned many a favor from me.
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[ The masks make her uncomfortable, too, truth be told. They are a few faces in a sea of unknowns and it makes her almost sick to her stomach. She can't turn in any direction without being faced by someone with gold or silver adornments or false smiles in place. It's terribly distracting.
She gives Cullen a brief smile as well as they walk towards the large doors leading to the foyer. ]
Don't thank me yet. I've bought you a few minutes at best. We can't spend too long away from our posts, even though Leliana and Josephine have their eyes on the floor too. Still, it seemed a fine excuse for the moment.
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[ Once they arrive to the foyer, Cullen finds refuge at a railing, where his hands rest along the surface and prop him up for a lean. ]
With how painfully slow this evening has started to play out, mere minutes may last an eternity. I'll find relief in even thirty seconds away from those people. Here's to hoping they give up and move away from my post.
[ But he's sure they won't. And Cullen wears a crooked smile to such a thought. He turns a touch, facing her while one elbow leans on the railing for support. ]
How are you fairing? Word has already flown clear across the ballroom about you quite possibly being a demon having escaped the afterlife. No doubt they've had quite the time pointing out the irony in my partnering with you.
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Unless the guards have a traitor in their midst. Maker, this is getting to be too much.
She makes a quiet little noise, not quite a chuckle, and she shakes her head. ]
Oh, there's a myriad of things being said. I've been possessed by a demon from the Breach, that you're keeping me on a tight leash lest I lose my mind. That the Inquisitor practices blood magic. That I brought Corypheus' archdemon with me as I was spit back up from the Void. Take your pick, they're all equally ridiculous.
[ Spurred on by boredom and bred by fear of the Inquisition's power, as well as Kaia's mysterious hand. ]
At the very least, they seem frightened enough of me to resist trying to fondle any of my assets.
[ Unlike some. She gives him a wry smile. ]
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[ Cullen can't help but chuckle at the mention of a "tight leash". Such a thought is as despicable as it is ridiculous. And it only ties back in to the supposed irony he has been accused of living in. ]
You would think the dire situation we are in would hold higher precedence than mere rumor and the spitting of poison.
[ He raises a brow at that clear mention she made of being fondled. ]
You saw that? I couldn't have possibly turned around any faster and I still could not find the culprit. Perhaps I am not maintaining a threatening enough posture. Surely, you must show me how to be more intimidating.
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Well, remember that we're present and our enemies are not. If we could convince Corypheus to come here himself, he'd probably have just as much of a headache with the amount of rumors and hearsay they'd inquire about. It's really not a wonder why he's determined to destroy the world.
[ That last bit, of course, is dripping in sarcasm. She gives Cullen a brief sideways glance. ]
And if you think people wouldn't use the moment to ask him to confirm or deny their little fabricated tales, you would be very wrong.
[ For all that everyone seems to be afraid of Neria being a demon, a corpse, or worse, no one has actively tried to avoid her. She doubts a walking, talking Darkspawn would be treated as anything but a novelty once the terror had worn off. She shakes her head, putting both hands out to lean on the railing for a moment. ]
Truthfully? I think they believe I'm more intimidating than I am. But if I want to impress, I just remind myself this: anything a person can do pales in comparison to facing down an Archdemon in a city on fire.
[ Her smile is just this side of self-deprecating. ]
After that, it's not so frightening to look down at leaders and world-shakers.
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If only it were that easy. I'd almost prefer Corypheus make his presence here so we can get it over with, rather than deal with all of this ridiculous game nonsense and blatant narcissism.
But the rational part of me pleads I be careful what I wish for.
[ His nose wrinkles at the mention of being more intimidating. Neria is hardly the sort, but she's apparently done better among the guests than he has. ]
At this point, I would be better off adorning deeper scars across my face. I just hope this night plays out quicker. The air here is thick and I don't quite enjoy being so possibly close to a potential assassin without knowing.
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[ Too bad that's a fantasy that will never come to light. Neria turns and leans her hip against the railing, keeping an eye on the door for a few moments. Her gaze quickly flickers back to him as she shakes her head, and she reaches out to touch his arm for a moment. ]
Your face is fine as it is. And you are allowed to tell them to bugger off, you know. Just...politely.
[ Realizing that perhaps touching him is showing too much, she releases him, allowing the gesture to look more friendly than anything else. ]
Do you have any suspicions of who it might be?
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[ But yes, it is a distant fantasy that will likely never happen, and Cullen moves on from the idea. His attention shifts back and forth from the door to Neria, keeping an eye out in case it is necessary. So far, nothing too exciting, and his attention is brought back to Neria when he feels her arm reach for him. It's more comforting than she might think, and Cullen manages a smile for her. ]
I am here to maintain appearances. If this is what I must endure for the sake of a victory, I'll do so. The last thing I want is to cause reason to feel insulted, and we both know how touchy some of these people are.
[ He clears his throat when she lets go, straightening his posture as he lowers his voice. ]
I can't be so sure. I have heard enough talks among the crowd, and Leliana's sources tell me of Briala having been a past lover of the Empress. There is enough motive after being made practically a prisoner to the court to at least arrange an assassination. But I've yet to hear much beyond that to support taking a side.
I can understand why the Duke sees it fit to take place on the throne. Military backing is important when running an empire, and it appears Celine is not as serious on the matter as he. She would be right to spend more time organizing protection rather than keeping appearances.
Why the Duke might be a suspect is still beyond me. It is yet to be shown, and we'll do right to await the Inquisitor's findings.
[ He looks back at her, his normally serious expression firmly in place. ]
And you? Have you heard anything useful?
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They are here to work. She remembers that, even if she'd rather see him continue to smile.
Neria hums thoughtfully, glancing over his shoulder to keep an eye on the rest of the room at his back as he speaks. When she replies, it is quiet, her tone low. ]
The Duke could equally be as desperate. I'll agree that it seems unlikely he would align himself with Corypheus; he seems the type to prefer something less subtle, something that would reclaim his honor as he ascends the throne. Aligning with a magister won't do that.
Briala... Calculated, possibly dangerous, but I don't think she would help Corypheus of her own accord. I don't believe she'd try to kill Celene, either. Not outright, not here. She has plenty of other opportunities, and to have the Empress killed at her own party will have her be martyred for it.
[ Neria pauses, thinking that over. ]
Or, perhaps that's all the more reason to do it tonight... Still, I don't think she's the type.
[ Briefly, her eyes follow a couple as they steal away into the trophy hallway and are, of course, berated by the older generals still conversing about their war days. She frowns. ]
...What if Celene is the one working with Corypheus to ensure her place on the throne? And tonight, he's sending someone to kill her so he can take it for himself?
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There... Is a chance at that, I am sure. We've both seen how likely corruption is, and I wouldn't be surprised to see if the Empress fell to similar temptations.
[ Cullen lowers his arms and shakes his head. ]
But I don't believe she would go such lengths. All things considered, Celene is a well put-together woman, far more concerned about peace to fall victim to chaos. Either way, Corypheus wouldn't need the threat of her as an inside agent as an excuse.
I hope Kaia is able to gather information fast. Time is of the essence, and the longer we are here, the greater risk we pose for ourselves.
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[ She bristles and nods, finally looking back at him. She has faith in the Inquisitor and her companions, and knows she will find something. They're running out of time...but for the moment, Celene appears safe. Surrounded by guards, by her cousin and Briala, Neria believes she is out of danger for the time being.
With a gesture, she steps away, nodding to the doors. ]
Come, we should return before too much time has passed. Leliana and Josephine are probably wondering where we've slipped off to.
[ And it isn't until she's close to the doors that she realizes how that must sound. She rolls her eyes and turns back to Cullen as she opens the door for him. ]
I mean-- You know what I mean. They're probably worried for...
[ It's then that she pauses, seeing something over his shoulder. All color seems to drain from her face. ]
Morrigan?
[ Even from a distance, she recognizes her...and recognizes Kaia herself descending the stairs with her, the both of them locked in a conversation. Neria takes Cullen's arm and pulls him with her through the doors so she can have a better look at the both of them speaking, her eyes wide. What is she doing here, and why is she speaking to the Inquisitor?
They can't linger. ]
...We must go back to our posts.
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Oh, come on, surely they don't think we're--
[ He stops, watching as the color leaves Neria's face and she grasps onto his arm and pulls. His gaze looks upon where hers is, seeing the Inquisitor and Morrigan in the distance. He knows... Of her at the very least, but why spark such a reaction from Neria? ]
I--
Of course, but... Is there a problem?
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She doesn't know what to say. How is she here? How did no one know that she was here?
For several moments, she is silent, simply looking back at Morrigan and Kaia. Then, she turns to him and shakes her head. ]
No. It's... I need to speak with Leliana...but that will have to wait. We should get back to our posts.
[ Surely Leliana must know. But if she did, why did no one tell her? ]
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Our posts can wait another moment.
Are you alright?
[ There's that serious gaze of his again, if not without a large touch of worry. ]
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Neria looks up at Cullen as he takes her arms, and she lifts a hand to touch his briefly, just for a moment. ]
I'm fine. I will be fine. I simply...
[ No, not here. Not where people can hear them. ]
I promise, we'll speak about this later. I promise. But I swear, I am fine. I was simply surprised to see her.
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Alright...
[ He takes a look towards his post, seeing that his fantastic crowd of "fine company" is still there. With a sigh, he takes one last look at her. ]
Another time then.
[ There is enough hesitation here that he doesn't even feel comfortable leaving her. But he must... With one last reach to her, a simple brush to her arm, he takes off. ]
Keep your guard, Neria. I'm close.
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I know. If I need you--
[ I will find you. And that is all she can promise as she returns to her place and awaits the Inquisitor's return to the ballroom.
It doesn't come soon enough, and Kaia is back again into the fray on her search. Morrigan has given the Inquisitor a key and soon disappears to be with Celene, allowing Neria to breathe again. If Morrigan is around, then surely the Empress will be safe. Leliana, of course, doesn't seem to think so...but it isn't long before Kaia is back again, bringing with her a quick debate over who might be guilty, who might be involved, and the stakes of letting Celene die.
So long as someone sits the throne... She had to make this decision once before in the middle of a war, but not in such a dire moment. The Landsmeet seems tame compared to this.
It's difficult for her to remain there when the Inquisitor leaves again, more so when she suddenly appears again in armor. But she insists that she will handle Florianne and she does so brilliantly. She calls her out at her own game in front of everyone, exposing her for the crimes she's committed, and she is very quickly dealt with. Neria feels a swell of humility at the sight, thankful, again, that it is Lady Trevelyan who is in charge and not her.
Kaia disappears again with Celene, Gaspard, and Briala...and only returns with the former to address the people. Whatever's happened, she hopes is for the best, and it feels as if there is a collective sigh of relief throughout the room. The war is over and Corypheus has not succeeded. It is another victory for the Inquisition.
Neria slips away at last to look for Morrigan and she does end up eventually cornering her. There isn't enough time for a real conversation, not as the ball is winding down, but Morrigan assures her that they will meet and speak again, as her old friend is being sent with the Inquisition, but Neria doesn't have much time to get any comfort or answers from her. Those will have to wait for another day.
She is about to return to the ballroom when she runs into Cullen once more near the fountain, and she gives him a small smile. ]
This has been a trying night, hasn't it?
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[ He truly believed the only resolution was for Celene to die. If Gaspard took the throne, at least he would do well with his soldiers and maintain a certain balance Celene could not. But Kaia seemed rather hell-bent on avoiding such a resolution, which Cullen actually could agree with upon discovering the threats Gaspard had made and the deaths he had arranged. Florianne is just as guilty, if not more, and he eagerly awaits her judgement upon their return. ]
[ There is glory upon the announcement of the civil war coming to an end, that they have the backing of Celene's empire to the Inquisition's cause. Such a victory is worth its weight in gold. But Cullen does not cheer, nor does he partake in the continuing festivities. He is tired, both physically and mentally. Between travels from Crestwood to Skyhold, straight to Halamshiral, he can count on one hand how many hours of sleep he has gotten. While there is worry in the well-being of Neria, he trusts that she would come to him if absolutely necessary. Still, there is comfort and relief when she finds him near the fountain. He's resting on a bench when she finds him, face in his hands a moment before he sits up. ]
[ Cullen greets Neria with a smile when he stands, gentle in its delivery. ]
"Trying" does not do it justice. But... Yes, it certainly has been.
[ He at least had been nursing a glass of wine, which he sets down. ]
The Inquisition has maintained yet another victory. Were I not so worn down, I might be inclined to celebrate.
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WRONG JOURNAL, WOOPS
LMAO I WAS SO CONFUSED
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